Perception is 9/10ths of the Law

6 Aug
I really wonder what people see sometimes. People tell me things about myself – usually good – that I just often have a hard time finding.  It makes me wonder where the real us lies.  Is it in what we see of our selves?  Is it our reflection in a polished pane of glass?  Is it what the world sees of us – and often times reflects back?  It’s been on my mind of late pretty heavily with my weight issue fluctuating as wildly as it has been.  I am hovering around 120 lbs. and I look in the mirror and still see FAT.  Even after all those years of therapy and affirmations and bullshit, the ‘body dysmorphia’ is still there.  
So it gives one pause to wonder just how dismorphic we all are in other aspects of our lives.  I know a lot of folk that are absolute, abhorrent turds – but they think they themselves are fairy dust farting fabulous.  Or do they really???  Is it all just a front for being a horrid waste of fecal matter?  It flips both ways, too, though.  I know others that are the most amazing and wonderous human beings that think so little of themselves it breaks my heart.
It has all given me the want to actually find out what is true.  Online you see what is presented to you.  You don’t see the cunty bitchiness (unless that’s the gimmick, of course).  You don’t see the sniping and the temper tantrums and the general unpleasantry.  You don’t see the manipulative passive aggression.  Or the yelling.  Or the throwing.  Or the ungraciousness.  Yet the real world doesn’t see the sense of worthlessness.  The loneliness.  The fear.  The false bravado that comes across as warrior like.  So I guess it’s all what is presented.  What is perceived.  What is allowed.  
What do you allow?  What is your perception – yours, theirs, and the truth?

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5 Responses to “Perception is 9/10ths of the Law”

  1. Lynne August 6, 2010 at 12:11 pm #

    Oh I can soooo relate here.. What I have had to discover (the dirty, grimy, digging indside way) is what I really am is not the physical shell, but my inner soul..My worth..

    I think the ones who think they are hot-shit have such low-self esteem…

    A long discussion to be had here so I'll not bore ya but say, I never met you, but your inner beauty is what keeps me coming back for more.. Point made…

  2. Kate August 6, 2010 at 12:48 pm #

    Perception is something that really interests me. And how do we even know who we ourselves really are? And then I ask myself what is 'being' anyway? And then my mind explodes. There are too many questions about who we are and how people see us.

    Kate x

  3. Marlene August 6, 2010 at 2:16 pm #

    You write amazingly well. Loved reading this…so much raw truth!

  4. Pat Tillett August 6, 2010 at 8:48 pm #

    This is a tough one, I'm in an odd place today. But what the heck…

    I will say, that one major good thing about this medium we're talking on right now is that it doesn't matter what anybody looks like at all. The only thing we have to judge, are words. Obviously, deeds are the better judge, but words are all we have. Maybe I'm a fool, but on here, I judge by what I read and I think I can sniff my way though a fog of word bullshit pretty easily.

    To know how good a rose smells, you gotta know what shit smells like first…

    If I don't think a person knows how the first one smells, I'm not gonna believe they know how the second one does. If that's the case I don't have a lot of time for them.

    Back around to the front side now…perception is a funny thing. I naturally gravitate to people who have suffered some and have a dark side to them. Those that deny it, usally can't fool me and I'm sure they aren't really fooling themselves. I would tell them don't friggin hide from me. Be who you are…

    One thing I like about you, is you are who you are! You don't make excuses and you don't hide behind a facade.

    If this doesn't make any sense as it relates to your post, feel free to delete it… crap!

  5. Nariane August 9, 2010 at 10:12 am #

    I have a love-hate relationship with the internet.
    I love the broadened horizons, information, and the fabulous people (and fictional creations)it brings into my living room.

    But I am saddened to the point of 'hate' that so many people feel that they need to create personaes as a cover for who they really are.

    Whether it's aging overweight “witches” who pose as youthful Goddess/Warrior Queens and claim powers and ranks they do not actually possess or those who create urbane coolness which if they actually had they'd be out having a life rather than snarking at mine. LOL

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